So it’s several days into the new year already, and I’ve yet to post the obligatory "Resolutions For 2012". You’ll probably recall that I suggested such a post would be forthcoming when I wrote the year-in-review item on Saturday. But then I got wrapped up in work and going Indiana Jones on the dusty, archeological treasures in the toy chests of our basement playroom.
I’d hate to have my International Church of Blogging membership card revoked, though, which apparently can happen, per the bylaws. One can only assume such repossession is managed by a man who’s known summarily as "Rocco", has fingers the size of mettwurst, and a disposition only his "dear ol’ mudda kin luv".
Nobody wants to meet Rocco. Which is, of course, to say, I don’t want to meet him.
So, then, to the Resolutions!
The thing is, though, I guess it’s not cool to have resolutions anymore? From what I gather on the interwebs this particular changing-of-the-calendar cycle, we’re all supposed to already be the best us possible, living high on our dreams, coming out strong every day, and basically just being perfectly, awesomely AWESOME like in some kind of post-modern individual utopia?
Look, if you don’t want to recognize the convenience of an arbitrarily selected day in early winter as a decent jumping-off point for the application of a handful of ways you might better yourself in the coming year, fine. But don’t kid yourself, sluggo, ain’t a one of us out there that couldn’t use a little self-improvement.
Not you, you say? You’re happy-like-a-little-girl-with-a-brand-new-mewling-calico-kitten every single day? Well, maybe. But I’d still bet you could find a way to be a little better to your fellow Earth-bound inhabitants from time to time. Self-improvement doesn’t have to just be about yourself, you know.
Even I’m not perfect, no matter what the Puddinette says*. I got mad at the poor kid working at McDonald’s last year because he gave me sweet tea instead of unsweeted. Seriously? Like that $1 tea was worth getting red-faced and ripping back around through the drive-thru just to call the poor guy the "milkman’s kid"**. Heck, he was probably sleep-deprived from spending all night at the shelter bottled-feeding a litter of motherless puppies after tutoring underprivileged kids in algebra.
Anyway, the point is that there’s not a damn thing wrong with resolutions – and they don’t even need to be New Year’s, either; nothing wrong with March 23rd Resolutions or September 16th Resolutions – as long as they aren’t two-week fads. Stick to your guns, kiddo. If you say it, mean it. Don’t treat this like it’s a party games.
Well…now that I’ve got that out of my system, what do I have on my mind for 2012?
- Writing, writing, and more writing. Which I guess is kind of obvious. A non-fiction book is probably going to be the next big project (I’ll explain why, but that’s another post), and I’d love to get it written with enough time to start on a second novel before the year is out. Oh, and yes, I’ll be keeping up the blogging here and with Hoperatives. Lots of word vomit in 2012, for sure.
- I could show a little more patience with people, especially the kids. You know, like when it rolls around to bed-time o’clock, I maybe could be a little more pleasant. In other words, my Sergeant Taggart voice comes out and I can bark orders like the USMC’s finest. That probably isn’t necessary, strictly speaking. This would be a good time to speak a little more softly.
- Being a little more health-conscience wouldn’t kill me. In fact, it’d probably accomplish the opposite. Don’t get me wrong, there’s no fad diet in my future. But consuming a few apples and not so many chicken wings couldn’t hurt. I mean, I’d rather stick with the buffalo wings, but no one’s popularized the phrase, "Hot wings each day will keep the Doctor away." Which is a bummer, really, ’cause I’d totally believe that if it was a phrase.
- Cutting back on the beer a smidge. Now, I’m not exactly Otis from Mayberry; I don’t get all crazy and end up staggering around the house trying to decided which of the three Puddinettes in my sight is the one to kiss goodnight. But whatever the cardiovascular benefits of a little daily alcohol, I’m betting I get more benefit from cutting back in accordance with item #3. Plus, and this is more important, swimsuit season is on the horizon. Gotta get rid of that muffin…er, what’s bigger than a muffin?…wedding cake top to fit into my Speedo.
- Try to get out a little more often. I’m currently about one step away from earning the Certified Hermit designation. While I’m not likely to become a jet-setter or anything, it’d be nice to go out with The Guys on Monday night more than once every season.
Obviously, this isn’t everything. A year is a long time and I’m sure new and exciting opportunities, as well as other ideas for self-improvement, will crop up before we drag the party hats and the noise makers out again. But it’s a pretty good start; I feel good about it.
Oh, and you’ll notice that there’s nothing like "Sell my Book" on the list above. Selling said book will definitely be something I put plenty of time and energy into towards in the coming year, but that’s not an outcome I have real control over. I will query my little heart out, absolutely, and I’ll keep at it regardless of whether it takes 12 months or 12 times that. But these resolutions, or goals, or whatever you want to call them, are about changing the things I have control over. Setting a goal for something that’s even a little beyond my power is a recipe for failure and frustration.
And those are two things I’m resolved not to chase in 2012.
*I mean, I know I’m close, though, right sweetheart?
**I didn’t really do that. I’m much too lazy to make that magnificent an ass of myself.