After implying pretty directly on Monday that Important Thoughts Would Come Soon! (meaning the following day, aka yesterday), I was pretty much double dog daring The Universe, The Fates, Dr Doom, or whomever you prefer to blame to intercede and render my half-baked schemes asunder by spinning things all pear-shaped. And since insert your symbolic … Continue reading Day 9, The Smoldering of The Fates
Exactly 370 days ago, I sat on my back patio and took a photo of some fledgling green peppers and posted it. A few days later I started a huge project at work and Life, well, life did what life does when you reach the dread Middle Ages and have somehow become a person of … Continue reading A Year And Five Days Later
Remember back around Festivus a year or so ago when I posted a rant wondering about this nonsense that everyone seems to freak out about the word “moist”? Well, as it turns out, my little reaction post was nothing in the grand scheme of thing. Because why just write meaningless blog posts about stuff when, … Continue reading Another word about THAT word, now with added science!
Front door needs replacedPut off for many moons, nowAdulting brings tears
She was folding my shirts all wrong. Instead of folding both sleeves back and then folding the shirt in half at the torso, she halved the thing longways like folding a paper airplane. And it wasn’t just my shirts, either. She folded my pants all wacky, too, not along the creases in the legs. Hell, … Continue reading Fourteen Years Later
At some point in the course of your adult life, you will—possibly against your will—be required to use SuperAmazeballsHolyCrumbsInsanity Glue to put one thing back into (hopefully) semi-permanent contact with a second, more stationary/stable thing. However, when the moment arrives to break out that tube of uber gel with the adhesive properties so mind-blowing it … Continue reading Universal Truth Of Adulthood, Number 87: MegaUltraUber Glue
As if usually the case, I had every intention of Doing All The Things this weekend. I was going to get all kinds of stuff done and maybe even mark a few things off the List of Husbandly Sloth. However, as is always the case on Monday, that didn’t so much happen. I guess I … Continue reading The Nine Year-Old Girl With a Stuffed Giraffe’s Head
Okay, so not really. I mean, I totally would probably rent it out if there was a good enough reason, because, hey, who's above selling out a little bit? Not me. I'd have to start getting a couple of pretty whopping doses of self-righteousness a day, I guess, before started worrying about piddling little things … Continue reading This space for rent
So it’s Friday around these parts, which means that by the time you’ve read this, the weekend will either already be in full swing or barely a mere step away from your greedy, outstretched paws. Which, of course, begs the question, what are you planning for your weekend? Me? Well, what I really want to … Continue reading The weekend approaches
As you may or may not know (depending on how many f#&@s you happen to give about what I do with myself...which I realize is likely closer to 0 than any other number), I'm roughly 15,000 words and 6-8 chapters away from finishing the first draft of the novel bearing the codename "Project Macaroni". As … Continue reading Making filler posts…like A BOSS!